Licensed California Relationship Therapist Ilissa Banhazl shares tips on how you can take control of your happiness.
Happiness is not a given, especially if you are dealing with present difficulties or past wounds. However, you probably could be happier than you are. That’s quite possible. A lot depends on what you’re telling yourself. The messages we give ourselves can either be supportive and loving or critical.
Read on to learn how you can have a better awareness of your thoughts, feelings and behaviors and take control of your happiness.
Happiness is not a given. It’s not a constant state of mind. It comes and goes throughout your day/life based on your childhood, levels of exhaustion, stress, and circumstances. Some people walk around carrying the wounds from childhood and happiness is not a normal state of mind.
There are things you can focus on to increase your happiness. Change takes work; interrupting negative thoughts patterns and behaviors.
How badly do you want to feel happier?
Areas to focus on to increase your personal happiness:
- Dwelling on the past
- The need for other’s approval
- Negative self-talk
How?
Have awareness of when you are working from any of the 3 areas listed above.
Notice the thought! Give yourself evidence to the contrary or start singing, dancing, or repeating some fun word to yourself.
Anything to interrupt the negative thought and take your mind somewhere else. You may be surprised and annoyed at first by how many times you catch yourself. Be patient with yourself. Repeat this interruption technique until you find a reduction in your negative thinking in these areas. Give it a few months and you will see a change in your overall happiness,
Summary:
- Reduce worrying about the past or future.
- You’ll never know what others think, so just be your best self and let go of the part you can’t control.
- Stop negative self-talk and try being nice to yourself.
Licensed Therapist Ilissa Banhazl is here for you with relationship and online couples counseling.
To learn more, call (626) 664-5924 or click link below to get started.
